Kim Kardashian, Accidental Tweets, Microwave Pizza and other Predictions for 2013

Kim Kardashian, Accidental Tweets, Microwave Pizza and other Predictions for 2013

Matt Popkes

 

I’ll admit, I’m about a week late on the “Predictions for the New Year” blog post. By now you’ve undoubtedly been exposed to countless articles, blogs, Facebook posts and drunken rants about what 2013 has in store. Especially in marketing and advertising, there is no shortage of clever quips and presumptions about the year ahead. After all, the only prediction that rings true every year is that everyone will have a prediction and will want to tell you about it.

So, better late than never. In no particular order, here are my predictions for the wide world of media, marketing, and the mayhem beyond for 2013.

1. Facebook will make changes to the user interface. People will lose their minds and forget about it five minutes later.

As sure as the sun will rise, the almighty and powerful Facebook will make a change to your news feed, photo gallery or God forbid, your privacy policy. The townsfolk will gather their pitchforks and torches and march towards Zuckerberg’s Palo Alto estate screaming of crimes and injustices against humanity. The audacity that they would make changes to the free service that you voluntarily participate in on a daily basis is just unforgivable. Then, in a few short mouse clicks, everyone will forget that anything was changed at all as they realize they…just…can’t…quit…Facebook.

 2. Super Bowl commercials will cost an all-time-high $4 million for a 30-second television spot and at least two will feature Kim Kardashian.

This is less a prediction and more scientific fact. You don’t become the #1 searched term in 2012 (Kim Kardashian) and NOT end up in a Super Bowl commercial. Personally, my money is on Pepsi, who will become known as the Official Soft Drink of Talentless Media Whores Slowly Draining the Soul Out of Humanity™. Also, a quick Google search will also reveal that $4,000,000 is roughly the GDP of Mauritania. God bless ‘Merica.

3. People who work in social media will make very public mistakes and get very fired.

In 2011, it was @ChryslerAutos Tweeting to the masses…

I find it ironic that Detroit is known as the #motorcity and yet no one here knows how to fucking drive.

In 2012, @KitchenAidUSA weighed in on the presidential debates with…

Obamas gma even knew it was going 2 b bad! ‘She died 3 days b4 he became president’. #nbcpolitics

Of course, in both cases it was some poor soul, entrusted with the keys to the Twitter feeds of these major brands that mistook the brand pages for their own personal accounts. In both cases, the accidental tweets were quickly deleted but not before being retweeted thousands of times (Seriously, who follows KitchenAid on Twitter? That’s the real sad part to this story).  Make no mistake, this will happen again in 2013 to some unfortunate, soon-to-be-fired sap because social media is human interaction in the digital space and humans make mistakes. They’re just not always this public and hilarious.

 4. Brands will overextend themselves, releasing inexplicable new products

Established brands can generate sales based on brand name alone. So, what’s to stop a brand from entering new categories by simply slapping their brand name on entirely new lines of products? In fact, it’s done often and often done well… but, not always. In fact, you can currently vote in an AdWeek poll for the best and worst brand extensions of 2012. Contenders include Paula Dean’s Kids Furniture and Dr. Pepper Beef Marinade. These things exist.

So what can we expect in 2013? Nokia® Gluten-Free Microwave Pizza? Nascar® brand Volumizing Conditioner? Only time will tell.

5. Myspace is “Rebuilt, Redesigned and Reinvented”. Still a glorified music player.

I’m honestly not too sure what to expect here. The word is the new Myspace layout and interface is pretty damn impressive. Personally, I’ve used Myspace over the past few years, but only to find bands I wanted to hear as it seems bands were the only ones actively using Myspace anymore. Now that Spotify has come along, I don’t even use Myspace for music anymore.

Not that I speak for the masses but I’m having a hard time believing that people can be uprooted from their current social networking and online habits to devote significant time to a new and improved Myspace. Regardless of how great the redesign may be or how many pictures of Justin Timberlake there are, it simply might be too late to make an impact. However, I could be way off on this one. Aside from ‘The Love Guru’, JT can do no wrong.

6. Daily Deals have hit the iceberg and the engine rooms are flooding

Groupon’s rapidly plunging stock price has lead to CEO Andrew Mason being named the Worst CEO of 2012 by CNBC.  Living Social concluded 2012 by laying off all but a couple dozen of its U.S. workforce. Suffice it to say, the once mighty daily deals ship, that saw Groupon go public with the second largest IPO since Google, is starting to sink.

Getting merchants to discount their products by 50% in the name of driving foot traffic while you pocket the proceeds has never seemed like a viable, sustainable business model to me. If the two largest players in the daily deals category are in this much trouble, the countless copycats they spawned during the craze don’t stand a chance of surviving 2013. The string quartet is playing and you better make your way to a lifeboat.

 7. Your parent’s television will soon be connected to the internet and you will have to explain to them how to use it.

At the end of 2012, 25% of households had TVs connected to the internet either directly or through an external device like a game console or DVD player. That number is expected to climb to 1/3 of TV households in 2013.

Remember teaching your parents how to check their email? Or maybe you’re currently fielding calls from home asking you what a “Friend Request” is and what the proper protocol is for responding? Regardless, it won’t be long until you’re giving a tutorial on how to access Netflix through the new Blu-ray player because Mom needs to catch up on episodes of The Good Wife.

Phew… so there you have it: good, bad and potentially, grossly inaccurate predictions for the next 12 months. 1 week down, 51 to go.

 

I’ll admit, I’m about a week late on the “Predictions for the New Year” blog post. By now you’ve undoubtedly been exposed to countless articles, blogs, Facebook posts and drunken rants about what 2013 has in store. Especially in marketing and advertising, there is no shortage of clever quips and presumptions about the year ahead. After all, the only prediction that rings true every year is that everyone will have a prediction and will want to tell you about it.

So, better late than never. In no particular order, here are my predictions for the wide world of media, marketing, and the mayhem beyond for 2013.

1. Facebook will make changes to the user interface. People will lose their minds and forget about it five minutes later.

As sure as the sun will rise, the almighty and powerful Facebook will make a change to your news feed, photo gallery or God forbid, your privacy policy. The townsfolk will gather their pitchforks and torches and march towards Zuckerberg’s Palo Alto estate screaming of crimes and injustices against humanity. The audacity that they would make changes to the free service that you voluntarily participate in on a daily basis is just unforgivable. Then, in a few short mouse clicks, everyone will forget that anything was changed at all as they realize they…just…can’t…quit…Facebook.

 2. Super Bowl commercials will cost an all-time-high $4 million for a 30-second television spot and at least two will feature Kim Kardashian.

This is less a prediction and more scientific fact. You don’t become the #1 searched term in 2012 (Kim Kardashian) and NOT end up in a Super Bowl commercial. Personally, my money is on Pepsi, who will become known as the Official Soft Drink of Talentless Media Whores Slowly Draining the Soul Out of Humanity™. Also, a quick Google search will also reveal that $4,000,000 is roughly the GDP of Mauritania. God bless ‘Merica.

3. People who work in social media will make very public mistakes and get very fired.

In 2011, it was @ChryslerAutos Tweeting to the masses…

I find it ironic that Detroit is known as the #motorcity and yet no one here knows how to fucking drive.

In 2012, @KitchenAidUSA weighed in on the presidential debates with…

Obamas gma even knew it was going 2 b bad! ‘She died 3 days b4 he became president’. #nbcpolitics

Of course, in both cases it was some poor soul, entrusted with the keys to the Twitter feeds of these major brands that mistook the brand pages for their own personal accounts. In both cases, the accidental tweets were quickly deleted but not before being retweeted thousands of times (Seriously, who follows KitchenAid on Twitter? That’s the real sad part to this story).  Make no mistake, this will happen again in 2013 to some unfortunate, soon-to-be-fired sap because social media is human interaction in the digital space and humans make mistakes. They’re just not always this public and hilarious.

 4. Brands will overextend themselves, releasing inexplicable new products

Established brands can generate sales based on brand name alone. So, what’s to stop a brand from entering new categories by simply slapping their brand name on entirely new lines of products? In fact, it’s done often and often done well… but, not always. In fact, you can currently vote in an AdWeek poll for the best and worst brand extensions of 2012. Contenders include Paula Dean’s Kids Furniture and Dr. Pepper Beef Marinade. These things exist.

So what can we expect in 2013? Nokia® Gluten-Free Microwave Pizza? Nascar® brand Volumizing Conditioner? Only time will tell.

5. Myspace is “Rebuilt, Redesigned and Reinvented”. Still a glorified music player.

I’m honestly not too sure what to expect here. The word is the new Myspace layout and interface is pretty damn impressive. Personally, I’ve used Myspace over the past few years, but only to find bands I wanted to hear as it seems bands were the only ones actively using Myspace anymore. Now that Spotify has come along, I don’t even use Myspace for music anymore.

Not that I speak for the masses but I’m having a hard time believing that people can be uprooted from their current social networking and online habits to devote significant time to a new and improved Myspace. Regardless of how great the redesign may be or how many pictures of Justin Timberlake there are, it simply might be too late to make an impact. However, I could be way off on this one. Aside from ‘The Love Guru’, JT can do no wrong.

6. Daily Deals have hit the iceberg and the engine rooms are flooding

Groupon’s rapidly plunging stock price has lead to CEO Andrew Mason being named the Worst CEO of 2012 by CNBC.  Living Social concluded 2012 by laying off all but a couple dozen of its U.S. workforce. Suffice it to say, the once mighty daily deals ship, that saw Groupon go public with the second largest IPO since Google, is starting to sink.

Getting merchants to discount their products by 50% in the name of driving foot traffic while you pocket the proceeds has never seemed like a viable, sustainable business model to me. If the two largest players in the daily deals category are in this much trouble, the countless copycats they spawned during the craze don’t stand a chance of surviving 2013. The string quartet is playing and you better make your way to a lifeboat.

 7. Your parent’s television will soon be connected to the internet and you will have to explain to them how to use it.

At the end of 2012, 25% of households had TVs connected to the internet either directly or through an external device like a game console or DVD player. That number is expected to climb to 1/3 of TV households in 2013.

Remember teaching your parents how to check their email? Or maybe you’re currently fielding calls from home asking you what a “Friend Request” is and what the proper protocol is for responding? Regardless, it won’t be long until you’re giving a tutorial on how to access Netflix through the new Blu-ray player because Mom needs to catch up on episodes of The Good Wife.

Phew… so there you have it: good, bad and potentially, grossly inaccurate predictions for the next 12 months. 1 week down, 51 to go.

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